dearest justine,

happy new year!
a hot water pipe broke on your floor in your hall in your dorm at college! all of the artwork you've ever done could be in potential danger because you didn't have enough room in your portfolio to leave it in there and thought, 'where better to keep it than in the back of your closet where no one would touch it?' perfect thinking! and, just to be vague and worry you, we're not going to elaborate in the e-mail you received beyond 'oh crap a pipe broke we're going to blow-dry the carpets and some people may or may not have gone into your room to lift stuff up off the floor which may or may not be too late to matter'. the amount of water could have been a trickle, or three feet, but we're playing charades! we really do love you, and appreciate you paying college loans and leaving all of your artwork on the floor.

we hope to screw up your future sometime in the following 2009, whether it be by another snow day on a crucial period in your animation studio time, by growing mold colonies in your dorm room and on your roommate's dirty laundry she leaves on the floor, or perhaps more dicks in the laundry room taking your clothes out of the dryer.

may happiness find you in your new year!

love,
rit & the shitty piping
xoxo